i bet my tongue is stronger than yours wanna find out
this post has 130,000 notes can you guess how many people have made out with me since i made it the answer is 0
(Source: secondndsebring)
top 3 things about me
- fuckin raw
- super chill
- funky fresh
- rule breaker

someone has waited their entire life to put that title to use and if he is not promoted immediately i am calling the l.a. times and complaining
(Source: tastefullyoffensive)
if i were a bird, you’d be the first person I’d shit on.
are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes
with a ten minute break halfway through for snacks
That’s the most reasonable pick up line I’ve ever heard. You’re hired.